I’ve heard this communication issue referred to as the XY Problem.
First, thank you for sharing that, it made my teeth grind with frustration. Second, I experience a variation on this that is particularly frustrating. I am a user that knows how to do X. I ask if X needs to be done. Others hear me asking if X needs to be done, and instead of just saying “yes” or “no” they make assumptions about why I’m asking if X needs to be done and instead suggest I do Y instead if I want to do something. I know that X is the appropriate action, what I asked simply if X needed to be done. When I tell them Y wouldn’t accomplish the task, they say, “then you should do X”. Right, thanks. I knew that already. That wasn’t my question. Which brings me right back to my VERY FIRST QUESTION which they could have answered “yes” or “no” with…“yes, X needs to be done”.
This happens moderately often to me and I haven’t developed a method to communicate the idea nicely of “Please, just answer ‘yes’ or ‘no’ and nothing more” without being rude. Instead I to go through this whole exercise again and again just to be nice to them.
First, thank you for sharing that, it made my teeth grind with frustration. Second, I experience a variation on this that is particularly frustrating. I am a user that knows how to do X. I ask if X needs to be done. Others hear me asking if X needs to be done, and instead of just saying “yes” or “no” they make assumptions about why I’m asking if X needs to be done and instead suggest I do Y instead if I want to do something. I know that X is the appropriate action, what I asked simply if X needed to be done. When I tell them Y wouldn’t accomplish the task, they say, “then you should do X”. Right, thanks. I knew that already. That wasn’t my question. Which brings me right back to my VERY FIRST QUESTION which they could have answered “yes” or “no” with…“yes, X needs to be done”.
This happens moderately often to me and I haven’t developed a method to communicate the idea nicely of “Please, just answer ‘yes’ or ‘no’ and nothing more” without being rude. Instead I to go through this whole exercise again and again just to be nice to them.