My favorite thing about conspiracy theories is the all-at-once victory these events are supposed to be.

Like, dissenting opinions are so heavily discouraged that everything gets turned into some 5D mental chess gambit. So you get things like:

They were trying to kidnap scientists without anyone knowing

Okay. Kind of elaborate for that, but why not.

And they made a lot of money.

O… kay. I guess. Does that mean the money was important to the scientist kidnappi—

And there was a lot of evidence on that plane they needed gone, too.

Wow, popping this plane really was a golden egg, wasn’t it?