My nVidia-branded plastic “sculpture” with a laser-etched 3D Eiffel tower and an actual pre-production GeForce 3 GPU embedded.

In the early 2000s I worked for a small game studio and got the attention from Nvidia for how we used their graphics cards. They wanted us to adapt our game to their new secret GeForce 3 project which was the first programmable GPU (as in shaders).

It was a crazy time with a lot of stories to tell. We got invited to the press conference for the new card, which was held in the Eiffel tower. Yeah, they actually rented the Eiffel tower.

As a thank-you for the work we’d done their developer relations representative had these made for all of the external game developers involved.

Maybe my little DIY walnut cased ESP32 universal remote

This little bronze orc:

It was a gift from my father, who in turn received it from its sculptor, Sterling Lanier. Lanier was a family friend and an editor at Chilton Books, where he insisted that a book he had read in Analog Magazine be published despite it having been turned down by a score of other publishing companies. The book was initially such a commercial failure that Lanier was ousted from Chilton–a grievous injustice, as the book in question is Frank Herbert’s Dune.

I used to paint back in college but I haven’t touched the brush ever since. I just don’t have the drive for it I guess.

My radial arm saw.

So I’m trans. And what I would bring is the Christmas ortament I got from a friend after coming out that says “Name’s first Christmas”.

If the timing is right, I would bring a mushroom grow bag with mushrooms sprouting.

If not… probably my radiacode gamma spectrometer and some of my radioactive items. Maybe a clock with radium painted dials and a piece of trinitite. I think that there are many different points of discussion that can be of interest to a broad audience (radioactivity, spectroscopy, electronics, US labor law story of the radium girls, nuclear explosions, background radiation… etc). As a bonus I can bring a UV flash light and show the radium fluorescence. Adults love UV flash lights.

Probably my wheelchair. It’s a pretty nifty little chair that has quite a few unique features. Also I would need it to get there anyway. Otherwise maybe one of my drawings.

My custom designed, fully 3D printed analog keyboards (which use 3D printed switches and stabilizers)!

https://imgur.com/CmaEsP6

That’s my AHEK-95 (typing on it every day) which was reviewed by a semi-famous keyboard YouTuber 😁

https://youtu.be/iv6Rh8UNWlI?si=vsgg9F5dr1fBagyU

I’d also show off my Low Poly Rose Twist Vase design:

https://imgur.com/bdxnr27

An amethyst crystal I found in my (gravel) driveway a full 4 years after moving in. It’s a good 8 inches/20cm long, and shaped like a tear drop. It’s amazing and I love it.

My Teenage Engineering Pocket Operators.

I fuckin love these things. I used to feel left out when my friends would try to play music together, but then I found a way to be involved with a few mini-electronic-drumkits.

You can sequence a bunch of them together and sync them, easily, as well.

Teenage Engineering makes a bunch of other cool shit, too. I’m not much of a musician, though, so most of it is way beyond me.

Somethings ESP32 related. Meshtastic radios, a controller I am building to add some features to my car.

I ferment stuff. Beer, hot sauces, kimchi, yogurt, wine, vinegar, cheese, pickles, sourdough, tempeh. I would share a probiotic smorgasbord.

I’d bring my best girl Laika, because she’s awesome and I don’t have any interesting junk.

Probably, my grandfather’s blades as they tell pretty incredible stories. In order of when he was received them:

• USMC Kabar knife. He was issued the knife when he joined in WW2. He was lucky to avoid combat. Really, really lucky. He was on a troop transport en route to Kyushu when the surrender was signed on the USS Missouri and Operation Downfall was cancelled.

He went on to join the rubber industry, working for a major manufacturer in Indonesia. He kept his Kabar with him and used it a lot but never in violence. The combat knife became a tool of agriculture. The original leather rotted away in the tropical heat and humidity, was replaced with an improvised aluminum one. He was an avid gardener in his retirement and continued to use it somewhat like a hori-hori. The aluminum handle is falling off at this point, so, I’m going to eventually replace it with one made from olive wood to complete the “swords to plowshares” symbolism physically.

• Indonesian Parang. This blade is similar to a machete in design, about 20-24in (~51-61cm). My grandfather was given this blade at the rubber plantation by a deeply despondent man. The man had been pressured into taking part in an honor killing but didn’t have a violent bone in his body. Not knowing what to do and not wanting to murder another human being, he came to my grandfather who was well-respected in the community (he was ceremonially adopted by the local tribe). They came up with a solution. If he didn’t have his parang, he couldn’t perform the killing. So, he left it in my grandfather’s hands, making him promise to never return it.

While that man is probably long gone, I keep that promise myself and strive to ensure that the blade is never used for violence. Perhaps I’ll see if I can figure out a good mount for it to permanently prevent its removal from the scabbard. Its continued existence, to me, provides tangible evidence that there’s always another way.